Here is a very interesting new take on an older debate: why is living together before marriage, particularly before engagement, associated with higher risks for divorce?
http://www.scienceofrelationships.com/home/2012/9/11/twos-company-but-is-it-necessarily-bad-company.html
It is an uncomfortable finding for us secular liberal folks…. accordingly, many explanations have been brought forth, such as that the two groups likely differed from the beginning (correlation is not causation, post-hoc is not propter hoc, etc.). This newer study though not only controls for many selection factors in a huge sample, but additionally uses a longitudinal subsample, which makes it harder to make those arguments.
Among other explanations that the article mentions, here is – of course! – my favorite: people who start living together before really committing to each other may “slide” into a marriage, rather than deciding consciously and fully before taking that step. Interestingly, people who get engaged before moving together show the same pattern as those who get married before moving together, which is consistent with that interpretation.
I simply take that as yet another vote for making our decisions carefully and consciously, and then truly owning them.
Rhoades, G.K. and Stanley, S.M. and Markman, H.J. (2012). The impact of the transition to cohabitation on relationship functioning: Cross-sectional and longitudinal findings. Journal of Family Psychology, 26 (3), 348-358.